Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Thank You for Smoking.

it was the very first one,
just one i said,
i dont really wanna do it,
just for trying it out,dude.

out came the smoke,
formless and unaffecting.
where's the high i wondered?
whats all this fuss about??

tried to do it right,
like getting the tunes
of the song u love perfect,
again and again and again.

got myself a teacher,
who knew the ropes
n would be willing
to let me be his pupil.

learnt to take it in,
savour it,let it into me...
let it get me into a high,
let it give me that'thing'.

brain's fuzzy alright,
n oh yeah the high,too.
on a different plane altogether,
man,it was so cool..!!!

tried it once,twice,thrice..
now too many times to count.
it wasnt for jus trying out,dude.
cant u see i really need it???

need to get it into me,
play havoc with my senses,
get my system in a mess..
till i lost myself in the smoke..

enveloped by the smell,
habituated to the feel,
fingers would but naturally
reach for those cigs..

cool no more it seemed..
pocket n me both empty,
just an empty shell,
left with carbonaceous lungs..

a brain that keeps ticking wildly,
body prone to sudden coughing fits,
limbs shivering uncontrollably,
lungs gasping for that air..

i tried n i tried real hard,
to give it all up..
what was the use,i said,
in commiting slow suicide???

but never knew anything,
more difficult than this task..
even the much hated algebra
seemed like a cakewalk..

i'd try for days n days..
then get back for 'sometime'
no relapse,i'm on track..
but bloody weak willpower!

then extreme cures sought,
to get out before i'm dead..
had to sign into that prison..
n get rid of that poison within..

what do i do,dad?
i'm sorry,forgive me dad,i'd cry..
i promise i'll be good,
keep my curiosity in check.

jus for tries sake,no more,
let me out of here,dad please..
before i get more desperate,
n get onto worse stuff from here..

i worked real hard n finally,
it was all over,all done with.
free to walk out from asylum,
free to breathe in some fresh air...

life was good,life was up!
back with good ol' friends..
man,wasnt it a miracle..
how i survived that fate..?

met this dude,really great guy..
asked me if i'd like to try..
this really amazing thing..
n get to another level of ecstacy???

just once i said,for fun's sake..
it wont hurt to just try..
i dont really wanna do it,
just for trying it out,dude...

The Peace-Maker

the peace-maker

Dont know where to go,
both my own,my blood and bone,
fighting against the other.

one has his pride
other has none..
one has her past before
the present...
one heeds neither the past
nor the future...

succumb to my own
selfish motives,
i support none
or so i do...
but to them i show,
i support both.

both are right,
both are wrong,
both blaming the other.
i hate to admit
but i dont want to
do that goddamned job..

i cant to do it,
i love them both..
i dont want to do it,
i hate them both.
a problem of your own,
resolve by consensus.

but no we are dragged,
into the war,somehow..
the burden of keeping peace
falls square on the kids..
stooping already with so much
on their spongy minds.

why give us those options
we cant ever take.???
why force upon us the choices
we can never make.??
why tell us to take sides
when we have nowhere to go.??

its not done,its so unfair..
asking me to settle for
a half-existent family..
asking me to balance fragile peace
between two avenging souls,
from whom i was born..

dont know how to be..
a peace-maker in this battle,
where either way there's loss...?????

Monday, August 28, 2006

Misplaced Incapability

An ode to Nothing-II

Misplaced Incapability:born with it?

want to be loved..
cant say nothing.
a misplaced incapability
cant do nothing.

want to be cherished,
but cant return nothing.
a misjudged vanity..
cant prove nothing.

million reasons inexplicable,
answerable to none.
thousands promises unkept,
complained to none..

dont want to be misunderstood,
aint expressed nothing,
dont want to be mistaken,
aint guilty of nothing..

waiting to be there
just a few words away..
set apart by an incapability
and our egos in fray.

had written this some time back,jus b4 maths exam...

Long road Journey

An ode to Nothing-I

long road journey:captive to nothingness:escaping its misery.

a long road journey
an endless way
an unknown destiny
an untrodden path..

lost and seeking,
crossed many mazes.
seeking and wondering,
gazed at many stars..

the skies opened up
and let down the rain.
the sun burnt up
the dry parched land..

a black dot on the horizon
lost in the sepia desert.
a mirage maybe,a vision
descending from the azure sky..

almost there,yet so far
fingers grasping nothing.
marked with so deep a scar
reminding of empty misfortunes..

its a long road journey,
an inherent curiosity,
to unravel our destiny,
a monotony of nil,null,none..

a captive to nothingness,
a vagueness of life,
this miserable nonexistence,
perhaps be over at the end of the journey..


hav written this after a really really long gap,so plz do read it n tell me if i still can write or hav i lost it.??

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Break Away..


Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray (I would pray)

Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I prayed I could break away

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
And I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jet plane, far away (I will)
And breakaway

Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging around revolving doors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me but
Gotta keep moving on, moving on
Fly away, breakaway

I'll spread my wings
And I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway

-----Kelly Clarkson--------------------------